wahhh i missed you~~~
(because there had been a day… that this suddenly disappeared off the face of my planet lol)
sorry. just trying this crossposting thing atm^^;;.
as i said, i don’t really write here (i write instead at my blackbook). but sometimes i can’t help but get giddy and spazzy, so…
btw. i lost my phone a day before the concert. LOL. it’s only the sight of Eunhyuk’s(?) jawline that somehow comforted me during those days… lol.
i’m thinking of getting an Iphone… mainly because i just want a phone i can draw on. lol.
EDIT: i couldn’t get lj cut to work properly. eh@__@;;.
hotback after my site suddenly going down without reason and preamble =.=;;.
and after experiencing another health scare again.
had only been writing about this in my TinierMe site (coinnssssssssss XDDD).
just a few weeks ago one side of my face swelled mysteriously (quite enough to bump my nose off-line).
i had it checked come morning, and the doctor diagnosed it a dangerous situation — if i don’t get it treated immediately, the infection would spread up to my brain and i’d probably die.
… you know how it feels if you’re told that ahaha =.-;;.
though i was not hysterical or something, at one of my private times i teared up a bit.
i was also forced to quit a job that i just had gotten into.
the reason for the infection? the doctor said it could be that big pimple at the side of my nose near my eye, or my sinus or something at my teeth.
i went to another doctor to get a second opinion, and though he didn’t really dismiss the danger i’m facing as diagnosed by the first doctor, he agreed on the sinus and the teeth probability, and gave me medicine and had me check with a dentist for a pan-xray.
the dentist didn’t really find anything wrong with my teeth.
observation and treatment period had been 1 week, and if there’s still no improvement i’d get a head xray this and even more treatment (this is probably the worst case scenario).
strangely (and thankfully!), roughly a little past a week the swelling went down.
doctor#1 and #2 said i’m already ok, doc#2 even said no need to xray as that’s overdoing it already (though i’m really doubtful because i want to make sure ahaha @___@;; ), but just come back if ever it happens again.
i just hope it never happens again =o=;;.
…uh, this is the second time that i got another severe health scare. spanning just a few months.
i mean, what could i do if the Lord suddenly takes me? i know i wouldn’t be able to do anything…
… but still i don’t want to die, and ask for a little more time because i still want to make up for lots of things…
… i still hope that he won’t take me yet if i do make up for all of those things though ahaha X__x;;.
i accept that this could just be the Heavens’ way of telling me to straighten up more^^;;.
…ah. i believe i had promised never to write about this kind of things ahaha. but couldn’t help it…
(and this week) is the anniversary of my trip to japan and watching this show ♥~~
wahhh… had it really been that long already XD??
with my current finances, i don’t think i could finance a trip to watch the new show this year >.<;; (unless there’s a miracle?? ahaha XD *crosses fingers for a miracle* and hopefully Rouma-san is back)
(but i’ll certainly join the Supporters’ Club one of these days XD)
and i really loved the memories~~~ not just of the show but of japan itself…
having been in japan… had sort of reaffirmed my goals in life. and i’m very thankful for that~~~ (ehh… i guess this is what typically happens when you’re alone and getting lost in trains most of the time in a far, unfamiliar place XD? but i think it felt a little different with japan… i sort of felt comfortable there♥ though it had been so cold back then ahaha)
reminds me, i haven’t finished my memoriam yet of japan =.=;;… (i really have to try picking that up again-.-;;)
i really want to go back >.<.
and hopefully, when i get back my understanding of the language is better, so i could converse better with my uncle and my cousin^^;;.
hopefully i could work out formally studying the language this year even with poor finances, a new job (finally! though i’m still on trainee-probie status^^;;), and school (if i get accepted at that new school, i would actually be working towards my 2nd bachelor’s degree^^;;;).
just need to balance my schedule and manage only 5 hours sleep everyday ohoho =.=;;;..?
wahhh i’ve been stung >.<;;;!
it looks like a bee, but my grandfather says it’s not a bee >.<;;.
…it’s the first time i’ve ever been stung by this type of insect in my whole life ahaha;o;.
i’m back.
actually it had been a few days already.
i feel tired of everything at the moment.
…wasn’t able to stay up for the Leonids >o<;;.
really felt sick and dizzy i had to sleep ahaha @___@;;.
not really obvious because i was posting. but then that was off drafts =P.
but i think i’m a little better now.
ice cream, even with the flu, can really help cure a headache ahaha. i don’t get that sick much so often that i forget the first aid ahaha.
as i look up to that dark sky and manage to see the bits of stars that manage to still twinkle through artificial lights, up to the point that i can keep my eyes open, i somehow remembered that time in the province when the sky seemed so near and the stars were so big and so white and so near as well that you can see they are really shaped like a five-side and you can just simply reach up and grab one.
how technology could sometimes mar things.
“Starless” is also one of Rurouni Kenshin’s BGM tracks, i remember^^.
i’m listening to this right now:
though i haven’t finished the game yet XD pc can’t handle it for now. grr Adobe for being too large >.<;;. really thinking if it should be the HD or the memory i’ll upgrade first.
some i really like are Forever and Instinct, two BGMS used/kind of mixed on this simple but kick-ass Sweet Pool pv v.2 X3.
i’m officially this right now.
XDDD;;; well, what else could be the result if almost everyone around you are sick and you’re the only one who isn’t?
doesn’t help too that i drank some energy drink slowly until afternoon. wow 1000mg of taurine @___@;;; — didn’t realize it was that powerful ahaha. now i can’t sleep, just when my body really needs it ahaha >.<;;;.
since i’m not being allowed to sleep, meh. 咎狗の血’s OST is actually keeping me even more awake now. til i tire out haha @___@;;;.
and helped me go through 300+ entries of LJ. yes. *accomplished*
it’s hard making decisions though when your head’s partially swimming…
will i be able to see some Leonids tonight…?
i really ♥ the Altar Boyz cast♥♥♥♥♥. actually up to now i’m still checking out their blogs occasionally XDDDD (except Rouma’s, for being mobile only bleh >.<;;). and it appears that it is also one play Masa could never forget ahaha♥♥♥ (learning process thing~~~! you can really learn much from older, more experienced people♥… not that they are -that- old ahaha)
also kind of happy that his song is being used somewhere. hey, it’s not everyday your song could be used as the ending of a show, albeit short (and i really find Melody Yoko pretty. like beauty queen pretty X3. with perfect English too♥).
now where is your calendar, Masa…
…than be in a world without sincerity and truth.
that’s my truthXD.
…even if sometimes it feels like i’m only addressing myselfXD.
but then if people happens to walk the same way, i guess it’s ok.
as for people… that’s quite a complex matter^^;;.
i try my best to keep what i can. i don’t really believe that i should forget those who don’t really care in return (i cannot forget anyway) — i just wait and see if they’ll come around again.
it’s like love.
ehh is that less blood back then actually just a fluke?
i realize it’s almost already a month since my actual surgery. but there’s still a little blood on my cotton.
am i just healing too slowly or what-__-?? uh, i think i am. should i take supplements already aside from vitamin c?
i haven’t been cut open before so i really have no idea =o=;;.
also trying to pace myself, and not rush my recovery like some people seem to try to goad me into>.>;;. i guess this is just another of those times that i could trust only myself? (or what my body clock is telling me, that is) and the well wishes and positivity from other people.
i should listen also to my body more. i wouldn’t have the stitch opening if i hadn’t let myself be pressured in the first place>.>;;.
i guess that’s why there are other people… to get strength from when you feel you cannot get enough from within you atm.
i’m writing a Vassalord fic right now. on my phoneXD. ah, my thumbs hurt ahaha. so i’m like on the stylus right now… slower ahaha =P.
…it’s starting to get painful as well, ahahaha.
and let’s do a repeat of this image
NOOOOOO I CAN FEEL THE BEGINNINGS OF A COLD ALREADY. noooooo i don’t want to get sick noooooo >~<;;;;;…. self-medication is so not ftw right now ~o~;;;…
i wish i could see the Leonids tomorrow.
